The Meat of a Dream

Yet another strange dream. I was at a Wiccan ritual with many people. There was some sort of circular ritual with a waterslide that ran the circumference of the circle with the entrance to the slide at the south. I did not enter the slide, I continued to walk around the body of the circle. The ritual seemed quite normal to me as though I had participated many times before.

Instead of finishing the ritual I sat down to eat. I piled my plate full with mostly roast chicken. I had two drumsticks and a breast. I started to mow down on the meat all the while thinking about the fact that I'm a vegetarian. I continued to eat the meat feeling that I was taking necessary action even though the more I ate the more disturbed I was by my own actions. Finally someone sat across from me and took the last drumstick and ate it. I thanked them for helping me out.

I have an idea of how this dream may be interpreted. The circle represents the circle of life and the waterslide is the access to jump into it. I have passed on jumping into life. Instead I sit down and partake in activities that are against my beliefs. This could represent my relationship with my boyfriend. I continue to exist in this relationship with a man who is fueled by negativity and believes that anything good in life is entirely fleeting and only a distraction from life's ever mounting pile of shit. I do not agree with him and we argue about it occasionally when he gets to be too much to handle.

I have been in this relationship for two years and feel quite stuck. I am filled with worry that he will succumb to destructive behaviour if I try to remove him from my life. I do love him and he is my best friend but he definitely hasn't helped me maintain a positive outlook on life. I am working on reviving that in myself and from time to time it does rub off on him. But I think my dream is telling me I need some help. Either I need someone to take part in my boyfriend's life to help him see some good or I need him taken out of my life so I can continue to work on myself. I wonder if that person will come along soon. I hope it's my boyfriend finally deciding to deal with his responsibilities, problems and emotions.